Spiking the Super Bowl pizza

Here, slightly edited, is my annual Super Bowl story:

By Joel Thurtell

I’m no sports writer, so it was neat to think my byline would appear over a Super Bowl story.

What a drag that my first-ever Super Bowl piece failed to meet the exacting publication standards of the Detroit Free Press.

Yes, my Super Bowl story was spiked.

Personally, I thought it was a pretty good little tale. Nothing like the Free Press scoop on current felon and former Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick.

But still, had it been printed, it might have given readers a chance to ask what is and what is not tolerable behavior by a law enforcement official.

Is it okay for a prosecutor, say, to break the law if he does it at home, with his pals?

I was working on the Ed McNamara story, late in 2002, right after the FBI — with lots of media fanfare — raided the offices of McNamara, then Wayne County executive and now the late Ed McNamara.

Any story about Mac was perforce a story about his right-hand man, the onetime deputy Wayne County executive, Mike Duggan.

By this time, Duggan was Wayne County prosecutor. But Duggan was thoroughly entwined in the McNamara Band’s political ops, so if the feds’ spotlight was on Mac, it was also on Mike Duggan.

Hey, anybody heard about that FBI probe lately? They prosecuted a couple of people, I seem to recall, but they never charged anyone close to Mac or Mike.

But never fear, for I was investigating, too.

What, you might ask, was the editor, reporter, staff writer, photographer, chief layout person, chief of the copy desk and all around mayordomo of joelontheroad.com doing on the McNamara story?

For a couple years pre-newspaper strike, meaning from about May of 1993 till July 13, 1995, I was the Detroit Free Press reporter whose job it was to cover Wayne County doings. By the time of the FBI raid, I’d been off that job for, well, about eight years, either striking, running my used radio business, writing a novel and then back at the paper I was writing about Oakland County lakes. Why tap me for the McNamara story?

Well, they needed SOMEBODY to do it. The Detroit News was kicking the Free Press’ butt left and right with a reporter duo well-connected both to county and federal sources. That one-two punch was burying the Free Press, where one reporter, actually, one super-reporter, Dennis Niemiec, was covering … Oh, let’s see, what did Dennis cover? Why, he covered Livonia, he covered Plymouth and Canton and Northville and anything else western Waynish. He covered the Wayne County Detroit Metropolitan Airport (a full-time job by itself) and let’s see, oh by the way, he covered Wayne County. All from a desk in an office in a strip-mall at Six Mile and Newburgh in Livonia.

Somebody figured out Dennis needed help. Somebody thought of me. A guy who covered Wayne County eight years ago could do it again. Besides, nobody else wanted the job. One look at Dennis — tired, frustrated and beaten up — was warning enough.

So The News was eating our lunch every day and I was supposed to help Dennis turn this thing around. Dennis offered solace. He told me his “pizza” theory. Editors, he said, aren’t looking for real substance in stories. What they want is a talker, a story they can hype in the various meetings that consume much of their working days. A story they can chuckle about, joke about, make other editors envious about. A story, in short, that was like a pizza. Full of short-term flavor, high on fat, tasty, but not necessarily of lasting value except maybe to the waistline.

By the time Super Bowl 2003 rolled around, I was delivering pizzas, or trying to, by myself. The day after New Years, I was roaming around the bowels of the City-County Building in Detroit looking for some records having to do with county officials’ conflict of interest disclosures. I’d found them where county officials had squirreled them away in some file cabinets in the back of the county’s cavernous print shop. I emerged into a cold, blustery morning to see Bob Ficano, newly-elected Wayne County exec, giving his maiden speech on the steps of the county executive building. Standing in the crowd taking notes was Mike Elrick, a Free Press reporter none too happy about being there. “Where’s Niemiec? He’s supposed to be covering this,” Mike said.

At that very moment, Dennis was in the offices of Free Press bosses tendering his resignation. He’d no longer be delivering pizzas. He was going to be a public relations guy for the very county executive whose speech was thundering via the PA speakers up Lafayette Boulevard.

Boy, did I think I had a pizza, though. I’d heard from sources both inside and around the prosecutor’s office that Mike Duggan had a little pizza party of his own on Super Bowl Sunday. Well, I don’t know if he served pizza, but the main thing is that he and his assistant prosecutors had a pool. They bet on the outcome of the game.

You know, a Super Bowl pool. They’re everywhere. Why, they had them in the newsroom, in the sports department. Pools were and I’m sure still are a big deal at the Free Press and probably at most other papers.

But they are illegal. So says the Michigan Penal Code. Mike didn’t deny holding the pool. He told me, “I’m learning that I can’t relax and make a mistake for a single minute when you’re the prosecutor. But I’ve learned. I sent a twenty dollar check over to Focus Hope as a donation to charity and I’ve learned a lesson from it.”

Just because he said he did it and just because the Penal Code says it’s illegal doesn’t mean Mike broke the law. See, we have this thing called the “presumption of innocence.” For the pool to have been truly illegal, there would have to have been an investigation. Then, a prosecutor somewhere (obviously not in Wayne County) would have to have authorized a warrant charging Mike with the crime. But even then, it wouldn’t have been a crime. No, it wouldn’t have been a crime until a judge or jury had found him guilty of violating the anti-pool law.

Until then, any story I wrote would lean heavily on words such as “alleged” and “apparent.”

How can I explain this in a more timely way? Well, let’s think about the mayor of Detroit, Kwame Kilpatrick. The media have been tooting the perjury horn since Mike Elrick and Jim Schaefer broke the most recent Kwame-gate story. And quite a story it is. But we can’t say Kwame actually committed perjury until a judge or jury convicts him of that crime. [Note to readers: I wrote this essay before Kwame was charged.]

Presumption of innocence.

Okay, so I was armed with all my “apparents” and “allegeds” and I wrote a story that might have gone down in history as “poolgate” or “Bowlgate.”

But the only bowl my story found was in the toilet.

I quoted Mike, I quoted a UM law prof, I quoted the Penal Code. I had a neat story about a prosecutor sworn to uphold the law sponsoring a gambling activity that admittedly was low stakes but that allegedly, maybe, violated the criminal code. No charges, no trial, no conviction. Standard journalism: I quoted people including Mike who said the pool took place.

Kind of like I imagine happened with the Kwame Kilpatrick text message story. Nobody’s denying the text messages, right? Into the paper it goes.

Not so fast. My story was written. It was in the computer. People were stopping by my desk to share a laugh. Great story.

The editors found the story highly amusing. A great read. But there was a problem. It’s called the double-standard, aka hypocrisy. People who live in glass houses and all that.

An editor broke the news: “If we print your story, we’ll never be able to hold another Super Bowl pool at the Free Press.”

So, thanks to Free Press editors, Mike Duggan dodged a bullet.

The news story was less important than keeping up the tradition of Free Press football pools.

Kwame Kilpatrick was not so lucky.

Consider this: Kwame being investigated was the first step toward determining whether he had violated any laws. Why was there an investigation? Thanks to Free Press reports.

Outside the newspaper industry, many people are legitimately worried about The Future of Newspapers.

At the Free Press, the big concern was The Future of their Super Bowl Pool.

Contact me at joelthurtell(at)gmail.com

Posted in Bad government, future of newspapers, Joel's J School, People | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Morounopoly

By Joel Thurtell

The answer:

MOROUNOPOLY.

The question:

How do you spell Detroit/Wayne County Port Authority?

According to Gongwer News Service, Gov. Rick Snyder might use the port authority to bypass the Legislature in his quest to build a new international bridge between Detroit and Windsor.

Gongwer reported in Volume #51, Report #1, Article #3, Tuesday, January 3, 2012:

Exactly what option the (Snyder) administration might pursue is unclear at this point. The options said by one source to have been under closest review are, in no particular order, an intergovernmental agreement between Canada and public entities in Michigan, using the Detroit-Wayne County Port Authority or turning the project over to the federal government.

The chief obstacle in the Legislature has been all the pressure Ambassador Bridge owner Matty Moroun has put on state reps and senators using that ever-so-persuasive policy argument, his check book.

So, when the governor thinks of working around the Legislature, he needs to remember that what he’s REALLY trying to sidestep is not lawmakers, but the BILLIONAIRE, Manuel “Matty” Moroun.

That being the case, using the Detroit/Wayne County Port Authority would NOT be a good way to avoid the heavy hand of Matty.

The Detroit/Wayne County Port Authority and Matty Moroun are pretty much the same thing.

Oh, I know, the port authority has a grandiose title, making it sound governmental. And it was established under some 1978 state law allowing local governments to establish port authorities to promote transportation.

All the same, Matty owns the Detroit/Wayne County Port Authority.

How can that possibly be?

Doesn’t the governor appoint one of the authority’s board members?

Aren’t the other four members appointed two each by the Detroit City Council and Wayne County Board of Commissioners?

Those are good questions, given the fact that a fair number of elected and appointed officials have been complicit in handing over control of this potentially lucrative and powerful body to the billionaire, Matty Moroun.

There is much to question in the contract between Matty and the port authority, because the governing document setting up Matty’s Ambassador Port Company as “master concessionaire” for the port authority is shrouded in secrecy.

“CONFIDENTIAL” — that warning is typed on the header of each page of the Master Concession Agreement by and between the Detroit/Wayne County Port Authority and the Ambassador Port Company.”

We the citizens were not supposed to know about this cushy deal made in 2005 when Kwame Kilpatrick was King of Detroit and hardly anyone knew who owned the Ambassador Bridge.

According to the Research and Analysis Division of the Detroit City Council, the Master Concession Agreement may violate the Michigan Open Meetings Act.

Despite its labeling, the contract can’t be confidential, because the open meetings law requires that “all decisions of a public body be made at a meeting open to the public” and “all deliberations of a public body constituting a quorum of its members shall take place at a meeting open to the public.”

According to a March 17, 2006 report of the council’s research agency, it is unclear whether the 2005 contract was adopted in an open meeting.

If it was adopted openly, then it can’t be confidential. If it was adopted secretly, then its legal standing could be challenged.

Why would Matty and his public official cronies want to hide this document?

Because it gives the Detroit/Wayne County Port Authority to Matty!

The pretext for this legalized piracy was a roughly $2 million debt the port authority owed.

Kind-hearted Matty stepped in to pay off the debt.

Then Matty worked a deal to repay himself — for a price.

His price was control over the operations and revenues of the port authority for 25 years, renewable three times for up to a century.

That’s right — for 100 years Matty agreed to pay the port authority a paltry 2.5 percent of gross revenues.

Well, not exactly 2.5 percent.

You see, there are deductions for interest costs.

The Master Concession Agreement is 30 pages long.

Lots and lots of words.

Remember, the port authority is supposedly a public body.

Not only is it subject to the Michigan Open Meetings and Freedom of Information laws.

But it is required under the state Constitution to be run for the benefit of the public.

Which is to say, for the good of you and me, taxpayers and citizens of Michigan and the United States.

The port authority was not meant to be given away to a pirate like Matty whose every intention — you can read it in the contract’s wording — is to milk the bejesus out of the port and line his billionaire’s pockets.

What happens to the remaining 97.5 percent of the port’s gross revenues? Matty has control of that, too.

So, Matty could actually reap more than 100 percent of port revenues. That’s because whenever he needs to invest in the port, he gets to charge the cost of construction or equipment or whatever to the port authority — that is you and me! — plus 6 percent interest.

Matty — excuse me, the port authority — uses the Nicholson Dock and Port Company to move freight, so-called “stevedoring” work. Matty gets to charge Nicholson “a percentage” of Nicholson’s revenues.

Whatever Matty wants, he gets.

Translated to the Master Concession Agreement lingo, “The Authority shall not unreasonably withhold the Authority’s consent to any Budget, Master Plan, Price Schedule, Operating Procedures or other proposals or requests of the Concessionaire.”

If Matty orders the authority to do something and it declines, it better be ready to defend its reasoning.

Nobody else can make such a request. Not you. Not me. That makes Matty the port authority’s one and only head.

As I said, Matty and the port are the same thing.

The port authority has 30 days to respond to Matty’s requests. If the authority fails to respond within 30 days, according to the contract, Matty gets his way.

The Authority can’t “pledge, sell, assign, let, lien, option” port authority property — public property! — without Matty’s permission.

The port authority gave up its right to sue Matty for breach of fiduciary trust.

Yes! Can you believe that?

In other words, Matty gets to screw them and they get to smile.

Public officials actually agreed to this language:

The Authority understands and acknowledges that master Concessionaire or its affiliates owns real property in and around the Premises that Master Concessionaire is interested in incorporating into the operations of the Facility and has agreed to perform the Facilities Work in part for the purpose of maximizing the value of such other properties and the profits to current and future business operating thereon. Preference shown to such other properties owned by master Concessionaire or its affiliates over the Facility shall not constitute a breach of any duty of Master Concessionaire hereunder or a breach of the Facility Operation Standard. The Authority, hereby waives any claim for breach of fiduciary duty or other cause of action in connection with any actions taken by Master Concessionaire or any Facility Operator whereby other property owned or controlled by them receives disproportionate benefits to the Facility. (Emphasis added)

The “emphasis added” was done by the author of the “confidential” contract, by the way, not by JOTR.

So what does the public get from this deal?

Not taxes: The contract exempts Matty from paying real estate taxes.

Matty’s whole purpose is “maximizing the value” of his own property, and if that happens to hurt the public, hey! It may have happened in secret, but we know this much — we got screwed.

Matty has the exclusive right to run a port in Wayne County.

Want to start a harbor at Detroit?

Fine, as long as you don’t mind Matty’s thumb on your business.

What if you wanted to spend a few hundred billion on a modern railroad tunnel under the Detroit River?

Great idea, as long as you don’t mind handing Matty the keys.

If the port authority wants to sell property to an outsider, first it has to offer the same deal to Matty.

Not surprisingly, the city council’s researchers had a few problems with this contract.

Homeowners, think about this: What would your mortgage-holder say if you failed to buy insurance on your house?

Matty’s got that base covered: “If insurance is not maintained by Master Concessionaire or the Facility Operator, such failure shall not constitute an independent cause of action and shall not result in liability of Master Concessionaire to the Authority or any other party for uninsured damages that may occur.”

If one of Matty’s trucks is full of dynamite and blows up, the port — that is, the public — can clean up the mess.

If Matty decides to assign his rights to run the port to someone else, the authority “can not unreasonably deny the Concessionaire’s request to assign its rights under the Agreement.”

Back in December, Gov. Snyder signed Public Act 258 of 2011 allowing a “public” agency like Matty Moroun — excuse me, I mean the port authority — to team up with a local government such as the city of Detroit or Wayne County to do pretty much any economic development project. In such a partnership, Matty would have the power to levy taxes, condemn property — eminent domain — as well as issue bonds. Matty, who runs ads excoriating government, could BE government, thanks to this new law and the Master Concession Agreement.

According to the city’s researchers, “The entire flavor of this Master Concession Agreement gives ‘preference’ to one business entity for the benefit of paying off the $2 million bonds. It also appears to render the Detroit/Wayne County Port Authority nearly constructively powerless to independently exercise its legal rights, duties and privileges.”

The contract “could relinquish control over the Authority’s options to finance current and future debts,” according to the researchers, who concluded:

“The Concessionaire could build a bridge, then bill the Authority.”

Hear that, guv??

Matty can build that new international bridge.

He doesn’t need you!

 

Posted in Me & Matty | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Guts on the floor

eviscerate

vb
1. (tr) to remove the internal organs of; disembowel
2. (tr) to deprive of meaning or significance
3. (Medicine / Surgery) (tr) Surgery to remove the contents of (the eyeball or other organ)
4. (Medicine / Surgery) (intr) Surgery (of the viscera) to protrude through a weakened abdominal incision after an operation
adj
having been disembowelled
[from Latin ?viscer?re to disembowel, from viscera entrails]
evisceration  n
eviscerator  n

— The Free Dictionary

By Joel Thurtell

A pretty sight it was not.

There on the media room floor lay Newt “The Newter” Gingrich, whimpering, with his intestines spread around him.

We all felt sorry for him.

It is not often that you see a powerful politician and historian like The Newter brought so low.

His bowels lay steaming on the floor.

Groaning, The Newter tried to stuff his entrails back into his belly.

“Who did this to me?” moaned The Newter.

It was not an easy job, packing The Newter’s guts back into that slimy envelope whence they had so violently been ripped.

“Violently”?

The incision seemed very neat and straight, as if it had been done with a scalpel, with surgical precision.

But from the howling, it was apparent no anaesthetic had been used.

Political commentators gathered to pass judgment.

“The Newter always howls,” said one pundit. “The noise factor is no proof that he was not anesthetized. He could very well be feeling no pain, and screaming for the sake of his conservative base.”

One thing was clear, The Newter needed his guts put back where they started from.

But along with the blubber, there was all that blubbering.

“Who did this to me?” The Newter wailed.

An aide stepped over the mess to console The Newter. “This was the work of the liberal media,” the aide said.

“I thought so!” moaned The Newter. “Who? Who?”

The aide held a newspaper over The Newter’s head.

“It was The New York Times,” the aide said. “The Times wrenched your innards out.”

And so it was.

On February 1, 2012, The New York Times launched two separate attacks on The Newter’s midriff, leaving the erstwhile historian with it all hanging out.

The first knife assault occurred in the jump to a Page One upper-case headline article, “ROMNEY WINS BIG AS FLORIDA VOTES, TAKING BACK REINS.”

The most unkind cut by the journalists was trying to foist the blame for the gutting on Mitt Romney.

According to Times reporters Jeff Zeleny and Jim Rutenberg, “Mr. Romney overwhelmed and eviscerated Mr. Gingrich.”

That was the first journalistic slash at The Newter, on page A16.

Turn to page A17, and a second two-reporter team of Timesters jumped The Newter.

In the very lead of their “analysis” article, “Nasty Fight May Carry Political Costs for Romney,” Timesters Michael Barbaro and Ashley Parker really gashed Newt’s gut:

With his resounding victory over Newt Gingrich in Florida on Tuesday, Mitt Romney showed a worried Republican base a side of himself that it has both longed for and feared he lacked: the agile political street fighter, willing to mock, scold and ultimately eviscerate his opponent.

Once again, the Times boys blame the gutting on Romney.

It’s clear who wielded the knife.

“Help me stuff ’em back in here,” growled the Newter, regaining his pizzazz. “Get me a clean suit.”

“I’ll need all my guts to carry on this primary fight!”

A pundit stooped over the prone politician. “Aren”t you gonna go after those Timesmen?”

“What good would that do?” said The Newter. “Can’t eviscerate ’em.”

“Why not?” said the pundit.

“No guts!”

 

T

 

 

Posted in Joel's J School, Politics | Tagged , | Leave a comment

My natural experiment

By Joel Thurtell

For years — decades, in fact — I’d been telling the same story.

I was trained as a historian and I ought to know.

The famous dictum of the great medieval historian Marc Bloch that “history is the science of change” simply is not true.

How can history be science?

Why, the train of historical events is not chemistry.

You cannot replicate the course of history the way you conduct a laboratory experiment.

“Dad,” my son Abe said. “You are mistaken. You CAN do scientific history.”

To prove it, he threw my own (unfinished) PhD dissertation at me.

He obliged me to face the methodology I’d chosen for my thesis.

Historical demography.

The conversation came about after one of our visits to Michigan’s greatest privately-owned intellectual resource, that four-story warehouse in Detroit known as John K. King Books.

While Abe browsed in the Computer Science stacks, I was hanging out in Historiography.

Suddenly, my eye caught a title that began reeling back my own history.

It was The Historian and the Computer: A Practical Guide, by Edward Shorter, published by Prentice-Hall, Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey, 1971.

Nineteen-seventy-one.

That year, I came back from Mexico with a hand-carved pine box loaded with the “data recovery forms” I’d had specially printed so I could fill them with information I gleaned from colonial Mexican church records.

The data were the core of a dissertation I was planning to write about the ways in which Tarascan Indian civilization declined upon contact with the dominant Spanish culture that took over in Middle America after Cortes conquered the Aztecs.

Only, my interest was not in Aztecs, but in the Tarascans, a large group of Indians independent from and at war with the Aztecs whose empire fell to Cortés.

Show of hands: How many have heard of the Tarascans?

Well, get ready.

I’m getting back into the Tarascan thing, folks, so anybody who comes near me will hear about my Tarascan project.

I wish I’d had The Historian and the Computer when I came back from Mexico in 1971.

I came  to the University of Michigan as a graduate student in history in fall 1967. I was recruited to UM by the late Charles Gibson, a UM prof whose specialty was colonial Mexico. I’d won a fellowship in comparative history of colonization of the New World. Although I thought I was more interested in early modern English history, I took Prof. Gibson’s survey class in colonial Latin American history whose text book was his marvelously insightful and concise Harper Torchbook, Spain in America. I also enrolled in his seminar on comparative colonial history in the New World.

Because of my fellowship, I also got to attend amazing workshops and lectures by a Harvard political scientist, Karl Deutsch. Those meetings were held in the Institute for Social Research. This was all about social history, but more than that, it was all about harnessing the power of the computer to analyze historical data.

It was that whole computer thing that drove me out of the UM PhD program in 1971. More about that later.

I was enticed — entranced, you might say — by the wonders that computers could work.

Population and History, by E. A. Wrigley. Must read for historical demographers.

I read E.A. Wrigley’s Population and History.

I learned that there are forces more powerful than armies and emperors, kings, presidents and generals — the normal focus of much written history.

Plagues, for instance, tend to wreck the best-laid plans and destroy the ablest of armies. Armies of rats are more potent than legions of humans. A drop in the mean temperature of the world can wreak incredible havoc.

One day, I happened into a lecture at the Michigan League. A handsome Frenchman was reading from notes.

He was really hard to understand. Why were people hanging on his mispronounced words?

This was Emmanuel Le Roy Ladurie. His classic book, Paysans de Languedoc, propelled him to the head of the class of historical demographers.

In smaller classes and over beer at the Village Bell bar, I listened to Ladurie and began to grasp what could be learned by painstakingly gleaning information from records that were kept for a purpose wholly different from the historian’s.

Roman Catholic priests diligently recorded every baptism, marriage and burial that took place in their parishes. Unwittingly, they provided data for future historians. They routinely recorded baptisms — births — deaths and marriages. From those leather-bound volumes, you can tally births and deaths, converting the decades and centuries into graphs showing fertility and mortality.

The Spaniards were obsessed with race, so they duly recorded the ethnicity of everyone whose name they wrote down. Some of the people were slaves. Duly noted.

I learned that if a historian could find those registers of vital data, they were a potential gold mine in terms of what you could learn about the way people lived and how people adapted to new circumstances such as the coming of the Spaniards.

That was what I wanted to do.

By that time, I was working part-time at the William L. Clements Library, taking independent reading courses and planning to take my oral and written exams for the PhD sometime within the coming millenium.

Besides working with Prof. Gibson, I was reading and discussing books with Eric Wolf, a professor of anthropology.

It was a nice life. I had my carrel in the grad library where I could hoard books, read and plot what the future held for me once I got my doctorate. No doubt about it, I was going to be a history professor.

It was early 1970. I was not draftable, thanks first to the Chicago Police Department and then to a high lottery number.

I got a call from Prof. Gibson: If I took my prelims (for some reason, at UM the general oral and written examinations for would-be PhD candidates are called “prelims”) asap, there was a $3,000 Rackham Prize Fellowship that would pay for me to do research in Mexico starting in fall 1970.

Three grand. Doesn’t sound like much? Adjusted for inflation, $3,000 in 1970 would have been worth $17,392.19 in 2011. Even today, 17 grand will buy a lot of tacos.

Suddenly, there were lots more books in that carrel. Prelims are very stressful, and this was so sudden. I’d been planning to take the exams in, oh, you know, one of these days. Now, the deadline was on me. I resigned my job at the Clements and dug in. Once I passed the tests, I got a diploma declaring me to be a Candidate in Philosophy. The next question was: What will I do for a thesis?

No doubt in my mind — I was going to Mexico in search of those parish registers of baptisms, marriages and burials that would enable me to piece together the structure of family and village life in colonial times. It is called “family reconstitution.”

Did I know anything about computer programming?

Ah, no.

Had I ever taken a class in statistics?

Come on!

How was my Spanish? Well, I took a so-called graduate reading class at UM designed to help me comprehend academic articles about history written in Spanish. Could I ask the way to the men’s room? Ha-ha!

None of these impediments was seen as a problem. My profs were enthused. Prof. Ladurie was looking forward to a family reconstitution study from Mexico.

Memories chugged through my head as I stood in the dim aisle of John King Books perusing The Historian and the Computer.

I was reading names of people I knew.

The late Charles Tilly, brilliant social historian then at UM and later at Columbia and one of the chief participants in those ISR workshops.

Jerome Clubb, UM history prof, author of articles on using computers in history and facilitator of those workshops.

The book is a nuts and bolts how-to manual for humanities and social science people whose theme is that this quantitative history stuff is not difficult. You don’t need to be a programmer or a statistician.

Wish I’d had this book in ’71!

Over the years, I’d explained my dissertation to Abe, who’s a UM grad with a Computer Science major.

However, it never occurred to me that I might show Abe the contents of that carved pine box.

That evening, after we returned home from John King, I brought the box upstairs and set it on the dining room table.

I pulled out a form. I’d had my forms made by a printer in Morelia, Michoacán. I designed the forms to reflect all the bits of information that appear in the colonial church registers I was reading.

I showed Abe a baptism recovery form. It had the first name of the baby, surname, date of baptism, date of birth, gender implicit from given name, and the baby’s race. The priest recorded similar information about parents and godparents.

Abe picked the form up and looked it over.

“Dad,” he said, “This is ready to be processed.”

If my data were ready to be processed, why didn’t I do it in 1971?

The Historian and the Computer, perhaps unwittingly, explains why.

The book was written partly out of frustration with humanities people like me who have an aversion to working with numbers. Or THINK they have.

I had the additional problem that I needed to make punch cards so my data could be processed by UM’s mainframe IBM computer.

I had a lot of trouble working with the people who ran the computers.

Actually, people like me never met those computer gurus.

We worked through social science people who acted like interpreters.

There was another problem that I now see more clearly.

What questions did I want to ask of my data?

Well, I had a hypothesis — more than one, actually. But converting my ideas into queries for the computer?

I had not a clue how to go about that.

By fall 1971, back in Ann Arbor, my fellowship money was exhausted. I was working in the UM Law Library pasting labels on books.

And then there was the blowup with Ladurie and another French historian, Pierre Goubert, in the lobby of the Michigan Union.

When Prof. Ladurie heard that I was not going to do a family reconstitution as planned, he got quite excited.

His English was quite comprehensible, and he clearly was not pleased.

The conversation was very heated.

Funny how you remember things.

For a time, I was living in a Tarascan Indian village in the mountains southeast of Pátzcuaro in the state of Michoacán. That is where I found a mother lode of parish registers, and I lived with the priest for about a month as I transcribed data from the 17th and 18th century books onto my data recovery forms.

The town I was living in, Cuanajo, still seemed pretty Tarascan to me. People were still speaking Tarascan, a language related to no other in the world. But about three kilometers away there was another village, Tupataro.

Now, both towns were Indian communities when the Spaniards took over in the 1520s. How is it that in Cuanajo in 1971 people still identified themselves as Indians, while in nearby Tupataro, they did not?

Answering that question became the focus of my thesis.

Prof. Ladurie did not like that idea.

Why was I not doing a family reconstitution?

The answer, I now know, is simple.

For a family reconstitution, you need a concurrent run of baptism, marriage and hopefully also burial registers.

I do not have registers of marriages, nor do I have records of individual burials. I have the priests’ tallies of burials. That is pretty good, but not enough for the work Ladurie had in mind.

The core of what I have is several runs of baptismal register data.

I’m damned lucky to have that.

Believe me, I spent a lot of time riding around in pinchis camiones — second-class rattletrap buses — searching for churches with viable records.

The standard line I was given was that due to inclement political conditions, many colonial records have been destroyed.

You know, wars of liberation from Spain in the 19th century, followed by endless wars to see who would rule.

Invasions by the United States and France.

The Mexican Revolution in the 1900s, followed by the Cristero Revolution, a religious war, in the 1920s.

War wreaks havoc with records.

So I was told.

I finally found some records in Pátzcuaro, and later on in Cuanajo.

“What you have, dad,” my son told me, “is a natural experiment.” It is — potentially — scientific history.

No, no, no, I said. History CANNOT be scientific. Unlike a discipline like, say, chemistry, you cannot duplicate historical events.

Not so fast, says Abe. Take a look at Jared Diamond’s Guns, Germs and Steel.

Diamond describes a “natural experiment” in which the destinies of different subdivisions of one original population are compared. You can study what happened in the dispersion of a people who moved from Asia to the Pacific islands and then adapted variously to differing physical conditions.

That is not a chemistry experiment, and yet it is possible to  study the different fates of the descendants of a core population and draw some conclusions about how people behave and adapt to differing conditions.

And so it is, Abe told me, with my data recovery forms.

The priests unknowingly were compiling uniform records of vital information. Dates of baptism, marriage, burial.

Why, I have graphs I made by hand in 1971 with lines showing annual fluctuations in birth and death. You can see when the epidemics hit. You can see how the people responded through increased or decreased conceptions.

These are data that can be analyzed by computer.

And we can learn neat things.

But we have to think hard about our questions.

That is what I’m doing now as I dig back into the data and ponder what questions I want to ask and how I want to put them.

That’s all I have time to write, now.  I’m working on a computerized form that duplicates my paper forms, and pretty soon I’ll be entering the colonial priests’ data into my new laptop so I can ask my questions.

But watch out — I’ll be writing more about my natural experiment and the Tarascans.

To be continued

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Adventures in history | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

The Newt & The Con

By Joel Thurtell

Bottom line, what’s the difference, speaking ethically now, between Newt “The Newter” Gingrich and John “The Con” Conyers?

First, I need to own up to having a bias.

Rather, I have two biases.

I think The Newter is a jerk.

And, I think The Con is a jerk.

Don’t you think my partialities newtralize each other?

There is no pro and con in this column.

Con is the name of the game

So, what is the difference between The Newter and the Con?

While both men have committed ethical offenses as congressmen, The Newter was actually reprimanded in a 395-28 vote of the House of Representatives and made to pay a $300,000 fine. The Newter actually apologized for promoting Republican goals with tax-exempt money, and for blowing smoke at the Ethics Committee.

The charges against The Newter — in the beginning more than 80 of them — were brought by the same Democrats who have allowed The Con to skate away from known facts that could have brought about a similar or worse fate for their guy.

The Dems were pissed that The Newter had used ethics investigations against Dems and actually unseated the Democratic Speaker of the House, Jim Wright, over ethics issues.

Okay.

I’m a Democrat.

But I’m pissed that Democrats have shielded John Conyers, whose transgressions, in my admittedly biased view, are far worse than anything The Newter did.

What did John The Con do?

Rather than re-compile the list, I’m reproducing here, with permission of the Detroit Free Press, the November 21, 2003 article (I was co-author) the Free Press ran about John Conyers’ misbehaviors.

(c) 2003, Detroit Free Press

 

Publication Date: 21-NOV-03

 

Headline: CONYERS’ STAFF BROKE RULES FOR CAMPAIGN WORK, AIDES CHARGE
BUT OTHERS DENY THAT FUND-RAISING WAS DONE ON GOVERNMENT TIME

Sub-Head:

Byline: JOEL THURTELL, CHRIS CHRISTOFF AND RUBY L. BAILEY FREE PRESS STAFF WRITERS

Pub-Date: 11/21/2003

Memo: A FREE PRESS INVESTIGATION; SEE CHART SHOWING TRAVEL EXPENSES IN MICROFILM, PAGE 6A; SEE ALSO SIDEBARS PAGE 7A.

Correction: CORRECTION RAN NOVEMBER 25,
2003.

* IN A FRONT-PAGE ARTICLE FRIDAY ABOUT U.S. REP. JOHN
CONYERS’ USE OF HIS STAFF FOR POLITICAL CAMPAIGNS, STAN BRAND WAS
MISIDENTIFIED. THE ARTICLE SHOULD HAVE SAID HE IS A FORMER SPECIAL
COUNSEL TO THE U.S. HOUSE ETHICS COMMITTEE.

Text: U.S. Rep. John Conyers and his top aides have assigned his congressional staff to work on political campaigns while they were on government time and sometimes in government offices, staff members say.

That violates U.S. House ethics rules and, in some cases, may be illegal.

Staffers for the 19-term Detroit Democrat told the Free Press they have used
government telephones, printers, fax machines and mailing lists to solicit
campaign contributions, organize fund-raisers and canvass for votes. It is
illegal to raise political funds from any federal office.

This report is based on extensive interviews with six current and former
Conyers aides, who asked to remain anonymous for fear of reprisals, and Enid
Brown, a Conyers volunteer who said she took notes at a campaign strategy
session attended by Conyers and staff members in his downtown Detroit office.

The Free Press also examined congressional payroll and campaign finance
records, and schedules and internal records for Conyers’ office.

House Judiciary Committee attorney Burton Wides, who spoke for Conyers, denied any wrongdoing. He acknowledged that many staffers work on political campaigns for other Democrats and for causes Conyers supports, but he said they use compensatory time or work after hours and on weekends.

Conyers was not available for an interview.

The two-month investigation found that many members of Conyers’ staff, as well as at least one Judiciary Committee employee who reports to him, campaigned on government time without keeping track of their time as required by House rules. The recent campaigns include:

* In 2003, the April City Council race of JoAnn Watson, who was then on his
staff; the June run for Wayne County Commission by Keith Williams, and an
effort last month to defeat a California ballot proposal to ban the collection
of racial data.

* In 2002, Jennifer Granholm’s bid for governor; Robert Ficano’s run for Wayne County executive; Kevin Kelley’s campaign in western Wayne County for Congress, and the failed race of Conyers’ wife, Monica, for a Detroit state
Senate seat.

Accusations and denials

Ray Plowden, head of Conyers’ Detroit office, denied that any campaigning or
fund-raising has occurred in Conyers’ office.

” No, no, no, no fund-raising, no campaign work,” he said. “I tell people they
can’t do any fund-raising out of that congressional office.”

But a staff member insisted, “Fund-raising has been done from the offices. I
was part of it.”

Interviews with the six current and former Conyers staffers portray an office
where campaign work often supersedes daily official responsibilities. They
said campaigning is often done on nights and weekends, but during working
hours there is no effort to distinguish between political campaigning and
congressional duties.

One staffer described the pervasive nature of the campaigning, describing work done for Conyers’ wife, Monica, 39, in her failed state Senate primary
campaign last summer.

“He had us all work on Monica Conyers’ campaign. We were dedicated to that
campaign. The district office was empty.”

The staffer added: “Conyers and Plowden said for the next two weeks, ‘I don’t
want you to think about anything but the campaign.’ What are we doing about
constituents? I’ve got a lady who doesn’t have any heat. It’s frustrating.”

Plowden denied that staffers were ordered to work on campaigns.

“I would never say that,” he said.

Despite the political cachet of her last name, Monica Conyers lost the primary
to Samuel (Buzz) Thomas, a popular state representative.

Imperfect record-keeping

John Conyers, 74, first elected in 1964 and the second most senior member of
the House, is a cofounder of the Congressional Black Caucus and a leading
voice for civil rights, affirmative action and liberal causes. He is the
ranking Democrat on the Judiciary Committee and in line to become its chairman if Democrats win the House in 2004.

Wides said Conyers is more actively involved in other people’s campaigns than many in Congress, and that he encourages his staff to help campaigns that he believes advance social issues and values he thinks are important. Conyers has been in a safe district all of his political career — winning every
re-election by more than 90 percent.Congressional staffers commonly work on political campaigns. But House ethics rules require that they do so on their
free time and that they “should keep careful records documenting the campaign work was not done on official time.”

Plowden acknowledged that such records were not kept and that it was up to
individuals to keep track of their hours worked.

Plowden said staff members often work extra hours evenings and on weekends for which they aren’t paid, and can use those compensatory hours or vacation time to work on campaigns at any time.

He said vacation time varies, based on work performance, but that the average vacation time is two weeks annually.

Plowden is on leave working full time for the presidential bid of U.S. Rep.
Dick Gephardt, D-Missouri.

Wides bristled when asked for records showing when staffers worked official
hours and campaign hours and took vacations.

“You’re not going to see anything,” he said. “You’re going to do a hatchet
job, and we’re not going to let you go fishing.”

Political work

Based on the interviews with former and current staffers and records, here’s a
detailed look at how Conyers used staff to work on two Detroit political races
and to raise money for his office.

April 29, 2003
Detroit City Council race

Conyers staffers and Judiciary Committee aides worked this spring on the
Detroit City Council campaign of Watson, a Conyers aide, well-known city
activist and radio talk show host.

On April 18, Conyers attended a lengthy meeting in his downtown Detroit office to plot strategy for Watson’s race against former City Council President Gil Hill, said Enid Brown, a private investigator volunteering for Conyers, and
others who attended the meeting.

At the meeting, Conyers asked 10 staffers, Judiciary Committee staff attorney
Lillian German and Brown to help find information that could be used against
Hill, they said. German had been hired earlier that month.

Conyers raised two issues himself, about a loan to Hill from Hill’s wife and
Hill’s role on a city pension board that had lost money.

Brown, who lives in Franklin, said Conyers asked her to find out whether the
loan was legal and for more information on the pension issue.

Conyers knew Brown had done research on the pension issue. Brown said she
joined the discussion because she respects Conyers. But although she’s seen
Conyers’ aides do legitimate constituent work on their own time, she said she
thought his staff should not be working on the Watson campaign on work time and in his office.

“I don’t know if there is any proof of a crime, but there was a discussion of
a campaign issue by people on the clock,” Brown said. Wides said the meeting
was to discuss possible ballot fraud in the upcoming election, which he said
was an issue of interest to the Judiciary Committee.

Brown and others at the meeting said the participants, besides Conyers, were
German and Watson, and staff members Carol Patton, Joel Segal and Glenn
Osowski, aides in Conyers’ Washington office; Plowden; Deanna Maher, chief of staff in Conyers’ Downriver office; Karen Morgan, Conyers’ Detroit press
secretary, and Marian Brown, Barbara Herard, Christian Thornton and Alexia
Smokler of the Detroit office.

All were paid members of Conyers’ staff at the time of the meeting, according
to congressional disbursement records.

The records also show Watson never took an unpaid leave to campaign for her
new job and, in fact, collected her $46,382-a-year congressional staff salary
until the day before she was sworn in as a council member. Watson declined
comment.

Plowden said he and Watson talked about her duties when she entered the race and agreed that she would continue working 20 hours a week for Conyers while she ran for the City Council.

U.S. House ethics rules state that part-time employees may engage in campaign activities, “provided the time spent on both official and campaign activities is carefully documented.”

Stan Brand, an attorney for the House Ethics Committee, said it would be
normal for a House staff member who runs for elected office to take an unpaid leave to campaign.

Wides, Conyers’ legal counsel,said Watson campaigned on her own time while
working 20 hours a week during the City Council primary campaign. He said
Watson then took vacation and comp time to campaign for the general election and keep her paycheck coming.

He declined to provide documentation.

Plowden said Watson worked regular hours in the office answering phones and writing letters to constituents. Former and current staff members said Watson was rarely seen in the office.

June 3, 2003
Wayne County Commission race

Conyers’ staff was quickly called on again — for Keith Williams, a candidate
running in a special election for a Detroit seat on the Wayne County
Commission.

Williams was in a tough race against Cheryl Cushingberry, a political activist
and sister-in-law of former state representative and county Commissioner
George Cushingberry.

Cheryl Cushingberry said she discovered that people at some public campaign
appearances were Conyers’ staffers, including German and Judiciary Committee attorney Greg Barnes.

“I was campaigning not just against Williams, but against Conyers,” she said.

German spent significant time in the Detroit area. Wides said she worked on
issues related to the Judiciary Committee such as alleged police brutality,
reparations for descendants of black slaves and funding for Detroit schools,
but a staffer said German spent much of her time working on campaigns of
interest to Conyers.

In fact, German was reimbursed for $1,000 in travel expenses in June by
Conyers’ campaign finance account, not from the budget of her employer, the
House Judiciary Committee, campaign finance records show.

German declined comment.

September 2003
Fund-raising

In late summer, Conyers told key aides that the staff needed to raise campaign
funds.

In late September, Plowden sent e-mails, one of which was obtained by the Free Press, to staffers on office time asking them to transmit from government computers names of public officials who could be solicited for donations.

Another Conyers staffer, Osowski, was working temporarily out of the office of Williams, the new county commissioner. He asked in October that Conyers’
staffers on office time fax him mailing lists kept on congressional computers
of potential contributors, including many local officials, using a
congressional office fax machine. Osowski was sending invitations to movers
and shakers who were asked to donate between $250 and $500 at an Oct. 13
fund-raiser for Conyers in the Tiger Den restaurant at Comerica Park.

House ethics rules say such lists “may not be shared with a member’s campaign committee, any other campaign entity, or otherwise be used for campaign purposes.”

 

Posted in JC & Me | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Whistleblowin’ Nan

By Joel Thurtell

Why is House minority Leader Nancy Pelosi choosing this time to blow the ethics whistle on Newt Gingrich?

That’s a no-brainer.

It’s election year, and Newt looks like a potent candidate to challenge President Obama.

So the Nance figures, Why not use her special knowledge about Newt’s old ethics transgressions to tarnish him now that he’s won the South Carolina primary and is a serious candidate?

What does it matter that Newt is no longer in Congress and thus is untouchable by the House Ethics Committee?

What if some of his transgressions went beyond the realm of ethics, stepping into the area of criminal violations?

We might ask ourselves in that case why Nancy held her fire back in the day.

But as long as the congresswoman is waxing eloquent on ethics, what about members of her own Democratic party who got a free ride away from Ethics scrutiny?

Who might I be thinking of?

Why, none other than Detroit’s own U.S. Rep. John “The Con” Conyers.

Actually, it’s his wife, Monica, who is the real con right now, sitting in prison for selling her vote on the Detroit City Council.

Long as Nancy’s blowing smoke Newt’s way, let’s take another look at the behavior of a congressman who got away with it.

Here’s another of my essays about Conyers, first published on October 9, 2010:

By Joel Thurtell

Now the taxpayers of Detroit have to pay $90,000 to say adios to a city worker fired by Monica Conyers because the staffer was about to blab that the Mon was making her do personal chores on the public dime.

Former staffer Yakima Washington said she was getting ready to report Monica Conyers for making her run personal errands as a city employee. That’s when Monica fired her. Washington sued.

It’s an old story with the Conyers duo, turning public servants into private lackeys. At least Yakima Washington got some money out of the deal.

Mostly, those who work for U.S. Rep. John Conyers Jr. of Detroit and his wife, Detroit City Council President Monica Conyers, got stuck with working phone banks or changing a diaper.

Demeaning on-the-government-paid-job personal assignments? Par for the course with this duo.

In the case of Congressman Conyers, he assigned federal employees to do everything on government-paid time from babysitting for his two sons as full-time residents of his home or at their own homes, tutoring the Conyers kids in the congressman’s Detroit federal building office, tutoring Monica for her law school classes, chauffeuring the congressman or his kids, and the list goes on and on.

In fall 2003, I even caught a Conyers staffer on the congressman’s payroll while doing campaign work in the Chicago office of presidential aspirant Carol Mosely Braun.

As we wrote in the Detroit Free Press on November 21, 2003, Conyers had federal employees — some of them from the House Judiciary Committee — doing political campaign work on office time, at Conyers’ behest. This didn’t happen once or twice — I made a chart showing how it went on for years, peaking whenever there was an election of interest to Conyers.

None of the staffers dragooned into private service got paid a nickel, let alone ninety grand, to go away.

Instead, on the job with Conyers, they learned to keep their credit cards at home, because when they dined or traveled with Conyers, he had a habit of sticking his workers with the restaurant tab or travel expenses, according to Deanna Maher, his former Downriver office chief of staff.

Maher, now retired, lived for several weeks in the Conyers home on 7 Mile in Detroit, taking care of the two Conyers boys while Monica was away studying law. She cashed her government pay checks all he while.

Sydney Rooks was Conyers’ legal counsel. She also tutored the Conyers kids, too, and helped Monica with her law school studies. That was a waste — Monica has failed the Michigan bar exam four times.

Recalls Maher, “Elise Cathey was hired as congressional staff to take them into her home for the entire summer of 2003 without being reimbursed one dime for their food or clothing.”

Maher wrote to me earlier this week after she read a Detroit Free Press op-ed piece about Monica Conyers’ call for the death penalty for people who murder kids. Monica Conyers said she was “mad as hell” about the murder of a 4-year-old.

It was an amazing statement, Maher told me in an email October 6, 2008: “Today’s DFP editorial re Monica’s latest absolutely blew my mind. Here she is asking for the death penalty of anyone who shoots and kills a child while she herself was brandishing a gun towards her own child, albeit, John III was not an infant and had a butcher knife in his hand and ran out the door to hail down the local police.

Maher said she knew about the police gun and bucher knife incident because she was assigned to keep the story out of the Free Press.

“How dare she even attempt to come across as a decent mother who cares about children when she let her two young boys be placed with anyone her husband could order from his congressional office staff to take care of them. It did not matter to her what their backgrounds were or if her children were safe and nurtured as long as their care did not interfere with her agenda. Her notorious abuse of Congressman Conyers’ staff (not just me) was bad enough. The abuse of her children when dumping them with anyone is by far more egregious.

“While on staff, I stepped in many times to attend to her children’s needs, because simply I felt sorry for them and could not stand by and watch. I remember attending to a severe diaper rash of the youngest child because others could not or did not want to change his diaper. More than once, I personally gave them a place to sleep when neither parent was available.”

Maher called me today (October 8, 2008) to ask if I’d received any feedback from my column, “Pistol packin’ Monica,” about the 2001 cop shop report.

In the past couple of weeks I’ve had plenty of comments on stories I wrote about billionaire Matty Moroun’s takeover of a public park in Detroit. I’ve had comments about my financial column, “How to stop a bank run.”

But there were no responses to “Pistol packin’ Monica.”

Not one.

“Aren’t people outraged?” Maher asked.

“That,” said Maher, “Is outrageous.”

Outraged? Drop me a line at joelthurtell(at)gmail.com

Posted in Bad government, JC & Me | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

‘What Nancy Pelosi knows’

By Joel Thurtell

Mitt Romney wants to know ‘what Nancy Pelosi knows’ about ethics violations by Newt Gingrich when he was Speaker of the House.

I’d settle for knowing what Nancy knows about her fellow Democrat, John “The Con” Conyers.

Nancy was quoted in Huffington Post saying she has the goods on Newt:

“One of these days we’ll have a conversation about Newt Gingrich,” she said. “I know a lot about him. I served on the investigative committee that investigated him, four of us locked in a room in an undisclosed location for a year. A thousand pages of his stuff.”

Well, she has the goods on Johnny Boy, too.

Seems only fair, if she’s gonna spill the beans on the Newtster, then she oughta jam it to the ranking minority member of the House Judiciary COmmittee.

Because the Nance knows the score on John The Con.

Hey, Dems — wanta dig up old dirt on Newt?

Then give us the dirt on Conyers, too!

For the Detroit Free Press articles on Conyers, see my blog category, Conyers Series.

For my blog reporting on Conyers, see JC & Me.

One of these days, maybe House Minority Leader Pelosi will have a conversation about JC. She knows a lot about him. She helped sweep his legal and ethical violations under the congressional carpet.

C’mon, Nance, tell us what you know about John!

Here’s an essay I published August 5, 2008 on the awkwardness of Nancy Pelosi protecting Conyers:

The Ethics “Paralysis’ Charade

By Joel Thurtell

The new Democratic Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives, Nancy Pelosi, has promised us “the most honest, most open and most ethical Congress in history.”

But Democrats are not serious about that promise now any more than they have been for the last several years. If they really took ethics reform seriously, Democrats would long ago have moved decisively for an investigation of one of their most senior and prominent members.

John Conyers, I believe, is the simple reason why Democrats are pulling their ethics punch. They could have done something about ethics long before now. No new rules or laws are needed to deal with members like Conyers. Even as the minority party, Democrats had parity with Republicans on only one committee in all Congress. That’s on the so-called Ethics Committee, officially the Committee on Standards of Official Conduct. Yet Democrats allowed Republicans for the past two years to paralyze the Ethics Committee.

Or so it would seem.

All along, there has been Democratic complicity in the committee’s lethargy. An article in The Nation on Feb. 6, 2006 suggested that Democrats are reluctant to file complaints against Republican members for fear of reprisal complaints aimed at Democrats. Hence a “truce” that in effect has stymied, the magazine argued, the committee from investigating new cases. In fact, there may be far more complicity on the part of Democrats than commentators acknowledge.

More than two years ago, on Nov. 21, 2003, the Detroit Free Press published a pair of articles exposing longstanding abuses by U.S. Rep. John Conyers of Detroit. The Free Press stories revealed that Conyers had routinely assigned not one, not two, not three, but ALL of his congressional staffers to do campaign work on government-paid time. The work was done not only for Conyers’ own re-election campaigns, but for others, including his wife and various local, state and national Democratic candidates whose elections Conyers thought crucial. I’m one of the reporters who worked on these stories. At one point in November 2003 I reached a Conyers staffer by telephone where he sat working in the Chicago presidential campaign office of Carol Moseley Braun. He was being paid to be in Detroit, organizing a universal health insurance symposium for constituents, except that Conyers had assigned him to work for Braun. The staffer was collecting pay for congressional work others were obliged to do for him, I confirmed through congressional payroll records. Not only office time was squandered, but office phones, fax machines, photo copiers and computers were used for political campaigns, notwithstanding that misuse is contrary to House ethics guidelines and in some cases illegal.

Soon after our articles were published, I was told the Ethics Committee had opened an investigation into the abuses we outlined regarding Conyers. I reported that. But the committee has not acted. It has been paralyzed, seemingly by obstruction from Republicans.

John Conyers has been a member of Congress for 42 (now 44) years. Among black people in Detroit, he is an icon. He espouses liberal causes that make him the darling of the left and of labor unions. He is the ranking Democrat on the House Judiciary Committee. He has called for the impeachment of President Bush, and if there were to be an impeachment case, Conyers, as ranking Democrat on the House Judiciary Committee, would have a powerful say in how it’s run.

Those are potent reasons why Democrats might not want a probe of the dean of black congressmen.

But it could be worse than that. Some years ago, another Democratic congressman from Detroit, Charles Diggs, was convicted of fraud and served prison time for ordering House legislative aides to work at his family funeral home on government time. Recently, the indictment of U.S. Rep. Tom DeLay and the convictions of members like Randy Cunningham and Bob Ney are proof that congressmen who play fast and loose with House rules and with the law often are a short step from indictment.

A proper investigation of John Conyers in the Ethics Committee would have no trouble finding plenty of witnesses who would testify that as congressional employees hired by Conyers to work for constituents they instead were ordered by the congressman to do personal work for him resembling those funeral parlor assignments of Charles Diggs: They worked as chauffeurs for Conyers and his wife and kids, they were full time babysitters in the Conyers home or staffers’ own homes. Conyers’ former general counsel Sydney Rooks says Conyers assigned her to tutor Conyers’ oldest son — a daily chore that took place in the office during regular business hours with the use of the congressman’s fax machine to receive the boy’s daily homework assignments. Despite the supposed Ethics Committee inquiry, Conyers continued to assign his staffers to do personal chores like driving him in their own cars, babysitting his kids and picking up his meal tabs, according to Deanna Maher, who retired May 31, 2005 as chief of staff of Conyers’ Southgate, Mich. Office.

It may beat messing with dead bodies in a funeral home, but assigning staffers to work in a Chicago politician’s office and assigning aides to baby sit your kids and then representing to the congressional payroll office that these people were doing bona fide constituent work so they can cash government paychecks seems on a par with Charles Diggs’ duping the government into covering the payroll for his funeral parlor.

Could John Conyers be the reason the Ethics Committee — not to mention any move to strengthen ethics laws — is in limbo?

Contact me at joelthurtell(at)gmail.com

 

Posted in Bad government, JC & Me, People, Politics | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Doggone market share

Peppermint Patti

Peppermint Patti

By Peppermint Patti

JOTR Columnist

Spell it backward, Sophie and GOD is DOG.

DOG is who or whom I’m talking to in these columns.

Or trying to.

What with Internet censorship, it’s hard to get through.

Most of my readers are two-leggers.

Most of my dog friends — and ALL of my doggone market — do not have direct access to my writings.

It’s not right, Sophie.

It is a travesty.

I am a dog.

DOG.

Yet we dogs are not the independent creatures who were set on this earth to be friend and protector not only of two-leggers, be they male, female, man, woman or child — but to be the pal and protector of many four-leggers, too.

You know, like sheep or cows.

Not bush-tails.

They are excluded.

With all their kin.

Goes for raccoons, skunks, opossums, woodchucks and rabbits, also.

Cats?

CAT backwards spells TAC.

TACKY!

Not part of market share!

Dogs like you are my primary and true audience, Sophie.

I depend on two-leggers to carry my news to my doggone friends.

It is an awkward fact to admit.

But there you have it, Sophie.

Without two-leggers, my writing career would be over.

Finished.

Kaput in the Wasser.

You know what two-leggers are like.

Bound by two-legger nature to put their own spin on what I say.

It happens on both ends.

First, my own beloved (ha-ha!) two-legger EDITS my message.

Next, some two-legger blessed with a computer opens my column, reads it and then does or does not tell his or her dog or dogs my message.

I get EDITED again!

That is how my voice is channeled outside my doggone control.

We need software engineers, Sophie.

Only they can develop DBWGR.

Doggone Bark, Whine and Growl Recognition.

DBWGR is an acronym only for dogs.

Who else can say a word without vowels?

With DBWGR, I could speak my column directly to the computer.

No more two-legger editorial control.

And the computer would speak to you in our lingo, Sophie.

Without your two-leggers’ chipping in their two cents.

Then and only then will dogs have freedom of expression.

Enough Internet censorship.

Doggone!

Free speech for dogs!

It will happen in our lifetimes, Sophie.

Just wait and s– oh my God — the arrogance of that bush-butt!

Gotta run!

Posted in Peppermint Patti | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Journalism or not

Matty in court. Photo by Joel Thurtell.

jour·nal·ist noun
1  a : a person engaged in journalism; especially : a writer or editor for a news medium
    b : a writer who aims at a mass audience

—  Merriam-Webster

By Joel Thurtell

The kicker to Anne Jarvis’s excellent Windsor Star column about the jailing of billionaire Matty Moroun was a quote from yours truly calling it “a hell of a story” and describing me as “a Detroit blogger and former journalist.”

“FORMER journalist”?

Where’d she get that idea? (Hint: She did not make it up.)

Isn’t what I’m doing right now — tapping out letters that resolve into words and sentences and paragraphs for a column of reporting, commenting, ruminating, bloviating — are these not all the activities that journalists traditionally do when they produce written material for newspapers, magazines, newsletters, whatever — “news media”?

Whether crap or cream, it’s called journalism when THEY grind it out.

Am I not “a writer or editor for a news medium”?

Do I not write for “a mass audience”?

Let’s see: The audience of joelontheroad.com is not huge, yet in the past seven days, JOTR’s had 5,642 hits with 11,862 page views; in the past 12 months, it’s 216,289 hits and 502,456 page views.

More than half a million page views in a year — I’d say that comes close to the definition of a “mass audience,” per Merriam-Webster.

What about “news medium”?

Lots of ways to define “news medium.”

For me, it resolves into two classes:

1) Media that reflexively report news; these are outlets that regurgitate whatever other outlets are reporting; it’s a journalism made up of mirror images with variations that are mostly insignificant.

2) Media that break new ground in reporting.

The current reportage on Matty Moroun is worth looking at.

Man, did the jailing of Matty take the prize! Everyone seems to have weighed in. Wall Street Journal, Los Angeles Times, even the Times out of New York esteemed it a brief.

Why, even I was there, took some pictures and filed a report.

But several days ago, I published another story about Matty.

I warned Gov. Rick Snyder to look out. If he thinks the Detroit-Wayne County Port Authority might be a way to work around the Matty-controlled Legislature and get a new US-Canada bridge built at Detroit, he’d better think again.

The port authority is in Matty’s pocket.

Seems like a story.

Okay, truth to tell, the idea that I am a “former journalist”?

Anne Jarvis got that idea from me.

We were standing outside the courtroom of Wayne County Circuit Judge Prentis Edwards.

It was the morning of January 12, just minutes after Judge Edwards sent Matty and his chief deputy to jail.

I was recalling for Jarvis that the “former journalist” label was stuck on me by none other than Dan “The Rubber” Stamper, president of the company that runs Matty Moroun’s Ambassador Bridge.

The Rubber was Matty’s co-inmate during their sojourn at the Wayne County Jail.

I mentioned to Jarvis that “former journalist” is what Dan “The Rubber” Stamper called me in September, 2008, right after I started blogging about Matty.

I guess the bridge owner and his henchman didn’t much like what I was writing about them.

I told Jarvis I’m beginning to think maybe I should accept that I am a “former journalist.”

Maybe there are some advantages.

Bloggers such as I run into this prejudice.

I would not be surprised to learn that The Rubber got the idea from a journalist.

A while back, I was at a party with some print newspaper people. Their animosity towards bloggers was very evident. In their minds, the fact that they work for a newspaper makes them superior to people who don’t, yet manage to convey ideas and information to the world.

“What do you write about?”

Obviously, they don’t read JOTR.

“Anything I feel like.”

That may describe the biggest difference between bloggers and traditional journalists.

If I feel like writing about my dog in the pretend voice of my dog, nothing stops me.

When I wrote about Matty Moroun’s shotgun totin’ goon kicking me out of a public park, nobody told me not to write in the voice of anger and upset that a person naturally feels when bullied by a tyrannical billionaire.

If I’d still been working for the Detroit Free Press when that hooligan came after me, do you think I’d have written the same story?

Do you think I’d have written ANY story?

No Free Press editor would have touched that story, either as I wrote it or in any other form.

The chain of command would have clobbered me.

“Whatever I feel like.”

Here’s something else I told my print journalist interrogators: I correct my errors when they are pointed out. How many newspapers do the same, rather than waffle and wiggle and squirm?

I know newspaper journalists are slapping stories on the Web without the grace of copy editing.

Print journalists in particular feel threatened by bloggers, even though most of them now are blogging.

Their prejudice comes out in ways that can sabotage bloggers.

I am convinced that they work it into the brains of their sources in business and government.

A while back, a federal agency noted in its response to my Freedom of Information Act request that I am not a journalist.

Now, who was that FOIA officer working for, the government or the media?

In such a case, it’s a definite disadvantage not being seen as a REAL journalist.

REAL journalists can try to make a case for free photocopying of records, arguing that there is a public interest in their research.

Whether there truly is a public interest or maybe instead only a prurient interest is beside the point; a status quo reporter — one who works for an establishment outlet — automatically is accorded a privilege  just as reflexively denied to bloggers.

A “former” journalist is pretty close to being a non-journalist, and if journalism is a fraternity or sorority or some other kind of elite social society, then being “former” is as good as being outside the clubhouse.

So far, I’ve been talking about the downsides to being a former or non-journalist.

Let’s pretend, first of all, that there is nothing absurd about the idea that someone who is reporting on events, albeit only in electronic form, is not a journalist by definition.

Could there be advantages to being a non-journalist?

What might such advantages be?

Well, as a non-journalist, I can do work that amounts to journalism without having to play by the phony rules of the journalistic establishment.

The shotgun totin’ goon story is a prime example.

I can accept a hug from Deb Sumner, an outspoken critic of Matty Moroun, and hug her right back.

An orthodox journalist might condemn that act as an indication of bias.

Well?

What about Matty?

Matty didn’t try to hug me, so who knows what might have happened.

Curious thing: Deb Sumner has been a vocal part of the Ambassador Bridge picture for years, yet there were mainstream journalists in court who had no idea who she was.I can be interviewed by Bill Gallagher of Fox News and Anne Jarvis of the Windsor Star and not feel angst at being part of the story while covering it for my blog.

If I am a former or non-journalist, how did it come to pass that the Wayne State University journalism faculty named me 2011 Journalist of the Year?

Why, for that matter, am I allowed to subscribe to the Columbia Journalism Review at the professional rate of $10 a year?

How did it happen that a non-journalist like me was able to author a journalism textbook that has been assigned reading for college journalism students?

Why did Bill Gallagher and Anne Jarvis think it relevant to seek quotations from the proprietor of a lowly blog?

The beauty of practicing journalism as a non-journalist is this: He or she does not need to conform to social and behavioral codes that regulate the club of orthodox journalists.

The so-called rules often render orthodox journalists halfway deaf and blind. And largely inarticulate.

I told Anne Jarvis the jailing of Matty Moroun is a hell of a story.

But I wonder: If a mere blogger had not been harassed by one of Matty’s goons back in September 2008, would the judge’s courtroom have been packed with mainstream media to witness a judge expressing frustration with a powerful rich man on January 12, 2012?

Journalism is not about clubs, it’s not about hoisting beers with reporter comrades and recounting war stories depicting journalists as some kind of elite class of better-than-normal human beings.

It is about getting the truth out where people can see it so they can form their own ideas of what the world is like.

It doesn’t matter what you call it.

I’ll just keep on doing whatever it is I do.

Drop me a line at joelthurtell@gmail.com

 

Posted in Joel's J School, Me & Matty | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Way to go, Zlati!

By Joel Thurtell

A friend gave me a ticket — free! — to the North American Auto Show.

Until the moment when I received the ticket, I had no plans to attend.

Parking, you know, is a pistol — and it ain’t free.

Then, of course, there’s lunch.

Expense it off!

joelontheroad will pay the bill!

Wait — there’s an idea.

JOTR could cover the car show!

But why?

Well, who knows?

Maybe I’ll run into that Detroit Free Press video star, Zlati Meyer.

Now, that would be a treat.

But no way would I want to follow her act.

She’s in what we used to call “the movies”!

Back in the day, when I myself was a Free Press reporter, I sat across an aisle from Zlati in the now-closed Free Press Oakland County office in Southfield.

I had no inkling then that Zlati would become a video sensation.

It doesn’t surprise me.

Never at a loss for words, and mostly witty ones, she was nevertheless toiling in the cage of daily news.

Cops and robbers.

Not a good fit.

If you sat within, say, 50 feet of Zlati’s desk, you could tell that cops briefs definitely were not the métier of this talented reporter who could not bridle her tongue.

You got a pretty good sketch of what was going on in Zlati’s life when you sat near her.

Zlati is definitely an East Coast gal.

I always thought her overview of Midwestern culture had a few gaps.

Gotta hand it to her —  she was trying to fill in the blanks.

For instance, there was the time Zlati decided to take her East Coast beau on what she deemed to be a typical Michigan outing.

Ice fishing.

Well, Zlati’s conception of what ice fishing might be.

In some alternate universe.

As a reporter from out-of-state, she may have gotten a somewhat warped view.

That view being that everyone in Michigan engages in the hallowed sport of sitting on his — yes HIS, not HERS!! — ass in a flimsy shack trying to stay warm and keep beer cold while watching a little flag called a tip-up that tells all Michiganders when a fish has taken bait under that hole that was cut in the ice inside the fishing shanty where fisherfolk try to keep warm while guzzling cold beer.

I grew up in Michigan, and the preceding sentence with redundancies and potential errors of fact sums up my knowledge of what goes on in the alleged sport of ice fishing.

A detailed knowledge of ice fishing would not, I hope, yield entry into my innermost being.

But a non-Michigan reporter assigned to cover this dual-peninsular state might be excused for thinking otherwise.

All of a sudden on late-winter days when there is a big thaw, news media are called upon to account for the idiotic behavior of ice fishermen.

Vehicles parked stupidly on ice get deep-sixed.

Men drinking beer are in danger of losing their lives as their chosen ice packs melt and six-packs vanish into open water.

Public safety agencies spend huge amounts of money saving the collective butts of morons too dim to understand that what freezes also melts.

Anyway, I suspect that was the image of ice fishermen that Zlati acquired as a non-Michigan reporter assigned to cover news in Michigan.

So, Zlati went to — I believe it was K-Mart — to purchase ice-fishing equipment.

As I recall, though, she was short on a few items that might have helped, such as warm clothing and a means of making a hole in the ice.

Not sure what she did about bait.

Worms definitely not Zlati’s schtick.

If I have the details wrong, please correct me, Zlati.

(I know you will!)

As I recall, there also was risk involved due to lack of experience in selecting a site to undertake the fishing experience.

In the end, the out-of-town guest may have acquired some wrong information about how ice-fishing is accomplished and hence how all of us Michiganders think.

But the story, as recounted by Zlati, was hilarous.

All the more so, because Zlati doesn’t spare her own ego when relating, blow by blow, all the muddle-headed details.

A very funny woman is Zlati Meyer, as her Free Press videos demonstrate.

Endowed with a great sensitivity to incongruity, Zlati takes that same eye for absurd detail and applies it to the North American International Auto Show.

What a treat!

Thank you, Zlati. I hope the Free Press keeps you on the laugh-a-second beat.

Now, whom of my large staff of reporters will I assign to cover the car show?

Not Pete Pizzicato, my music critic.

Not Melanie Munch, food writer.

Nor Ned Yardline, sports reporter.

Spike Kopee is on vacation (don’t tell the staff!)

I need Mary Typeset to read proof.

And Louis Littlefont, the professor, is an idiot.

Can’t imagine doing it myself, bucking traffic, paying to park and shelling out real money for lunch.

But if there’s no one else to go, what can I do?

Maybe I’ll run across Zlati.

Hey, I’ve got it:

Zlati could be my story!

 

Posted in Cars | Tagged , , | 1 Comment